The Root Cause
This may be the hardest concept to accept, but it is by far the most important of all. It is the one that may tempt most people to leave or go back to the search page. And, yet, if this one root cause is seen to be the root cause, the good this can bring about would overshadow every book on healthy relationships ever written.
Are you ready? The root cause of every marital breakdown is separation from God. To some, this will feel like the obvious has been stated and therefore it is worthless. For others, this will seem like taking the opportunity of a time of weakness to shove a religion down people’s throats when they’re desperate for anything that will promise to save their marriages.
But, if you can stop and ask yourself honestly whether this is true, just for a moment, just to meditate on it and ask yourself what it means to say this and whether it is true, and then ask yourself if your conscience and God would agree with this point, there will be a change in your heart, your mind, and your life that may very well put you on the road to the greatest of all blessings.
What Does This Mean?
Better yet, let’s start with what this doesn’t mean. It doesn’t mean you are the one separated from God. One mistake people often make is assuming that when a marriage breaks up it is both spouses’ fault every time.
But it does mean that if your marriage is broken, either you are separated from God or your spouse is separated from God, or both of you are separated from God.
That may be true as well or it may not. But, the biggest crisis of all is not that your marriage is falling apart or that your spouse is being unfaithful, unfair, brutal, indulging in drugs, alcohol, pedophilia, homosexuality or anything else. Indeed it would be extremely tragic if any of these were true, but the crisis at the root is that someone is separated from God and going to hell and they’re going to take others with him or her by example if something doesn’t change.
If you are not convinced of this fact nothing more will help. Adultery is the symptom. Sin is the problem. Separation from God is at the root. A person can never have faith in God and have no desire or intention to trust and obey God. That is simply impossible. And it is impossible to obey God while indulging in the kind of sinful behavior that takes marriages apart.
Some will know this is true right from the start. Some will be in denial and quarrel with this notion or regard this as heretical and abandon this site at once, and that is OK. The people who do this will leave with this thought as the final, last impression and message of this web site and for them, it will be the most important message. It would be better for them not to read another word of this site until they come to grips with this one fact and that is that there are no unfaithful spouses who are heaven bound.
